The gag about Sen. JD Vance (R-OH) seeking sectional healing in the passionate embrace of a couch has made the jump to a presidential campaign rally —is it fair game or a heinous assault on truth? Should allies of Vice President Kamala Harris abandon the “couch-fucker” jokes?

An X/Twitter user kicked off a social media furor several weeks ago with the false claim that Vance’s book contained a confession that he once had sexual congress with a couch.

There is no such passage in Vance’s book, but the viral tweet sparked a surreal fact-check from The Associated Press that has since been deleted and another by Snopes that you can still read. The theme has been taken up to mock Vance by Trump opponents.

Then, on Tuesday, Gov. Tim Walz (D-MN) referenced the gag at his first rally as the VP’s running mate — with Harris laughing along next to him:

And I got to tell you, I can’t wait to debate the guy.  (Applause.)  That is if — if he’s willing to get off the couch and show up, so — (laughter).  You see what I did there?

That prompted outrage — on top of the existing outrage that other Harris allies had referenced the joke and also called Trump and Vance “weird” — perhaps typified by CNN’s Jake Tapper, who accused Walz of spreading a “gross smear”:

There’s been a lot of commentary along these lines, so I’m not trying to pick on Jake, but I do think a few clarifications are in order.

First of all, what the governor did was not, strictly speaking, a smear. The original post certainly could qualify for that label, and it seems to have convinced enough people to have warranted fact-checking.

But even that action should probably more accurately be described as an expert prank. It was not designed to withstand scrutiny or be convincing in anything but the most extremely short term.

You could argue that what Harris’s running mate did, and what other allies of the VP have done, are jokes about the joke. They are also not trying to convince anyone of the truth of the gag.

The joke is that JD Vance is so weird, even an absurd claim like the couch joke seems plausible. In that way, it is reminiscent of the Ted Cruz zodiac killer thing. Yes there were probably some people convinced by it, but even Cruz eventually got on board and embraced the joke.

Second, Vance is not jokingly alleged to have had sex with a couch — he is jokingly alleged to have had sex with a glove lodged between couch cushions. While that sounds implausible, it’s literally in the “Beginner’s Guide” for a popular male sex toy:

Some people like to “FLy Hands Free”, for example by placing the Fleshlight in between a towel and pillow on the bed; wedging (“sandwiching”) a Fleshlight in between a chair and their table, or a bed-mattress and a box spring or two cushions on a couch; another method would be taking a shoe and sliding the Fleshlight in it.

Don’t ask me how I knew that.

Third, as John Oliver pointed out, the provable lie is not that JD Vance had sex with a couch; it’s that he wrote about it in his book:

…We care a lot about facts and precise phrasing on this show. So I can tell you, you can’t say JD Vance didn’t have sex with a couch definitively.

You can say that he didn’t write about doing that in his book because that is provable. But that’s not the same as asserting he never fucked a couch, especially because he hasn’t officially denied it.

But we wanted to give him the opportunity to do that. So we contacted the Barnes campaign this week, calling one of their spokespeople. And when we asked, and I quote, “Has Senator Vance ever had sex with a couch?”.

They, and this is true, hung up on us, which is — and this is critical — not a no. Is it?

We did. We then followed up by both texting and emailing the same question again, as well as asking if you had sex with any other furniture or household items.

But as of taping, we sadly haven’t heard back. And look who knows where this is going. The news is moving so fast right now.

…Until he tells us otherwise, I’m going to assume that JD Vance fucked a couch.

Still, presidential candidates are not the same as cable news comedy hosts so Vance should be treated as innocent until proven guilty of couch – glove love. But that’s not the same as saying they shouldn’t make jokes about it. Or that they should. I’m stringing you along so you wait around for my conclusion and watch all the videos.

Now, a lot of people who are not fans of Trump and Vance will respond to the outrage by rattling off a lengthy list of shit that Trump and his minions have said and crying, “False equivalence!”

Trump literally was found liable for defaming a woman that a judge says he raped and was the subject of attacks from other Republicans about his allegedly tiny penis – an attack which includes a sworn eyewitness, by the way.

Donald Trump accused President Biden of supporting the murder of actual live babies during a live debate moderated by the same Jake Tapper who was disgusted by the couch gag, but didn’t make a peep at the baby-killing thing.

Those people shrieking “false equivalence” would be right, but that doesn’t mean it’s right for Trump opponents to run with the couch gag. 600 million much more serious wrongs don’t make a right.

Which is also not to say that we shouldn’t still shriek it because it is a huge problem with the media. The same problem that had the now-fired ahead of a network that literally had pipe bombings incited against it want to cow toe to Republicans.

I think SNL alum Cecily Strong summed up this take on the joke, which she freely admitted is based on a falsehood but which she explained the utility of during a fundraising call:

REP. ERIC SWALWELL: JD Vance has some very strange and upsetting positions, honestly. Just ask his couch.

CECILY STRONG: And you wouldn’t do this one, so I’m going to do it.

REP. ERIC SWALWELL: I’m not gonna do it —

CECILY STRONG: JD claims to be the voice of the Rust Belt, which is only true if we are talking about his belt after he fucks an orange couch.

Rep. Swalwell didn’t want to do that one for some reason.

I like the couch thing because the couch thing finally gave Republicans a taste of what it’s like when you make something up insane and keep repeating it so that it becomes accepted as reality. Like “men competing in women’s sports” or Tim Scott having a wife.

Again, wrongs don’t make a right — no matter how satisfying.

However, as long as the references are of the oblique, winking sort that Walz made — and doesn’t veer into explicit repetition of the charge — the gag isn’t just fair game, it’s tremendously useful.

Aside from illustrating just how humorless the media and Trump fans can be, the joke has proven to be extremely triggering. That’s useful because it serves to prove the point and keep the opponent talking about it. It also carries the extreme likelihood that the joke will provoke the kind of sensitive response that will inevitably reinforce the terrible things that the Harris campaign wants people to know about Trump and his running mate.

And finally, the constant attention to the falseness of the charge will alienate all of the couch fuckers who finally felt seen but who now will rush into the Harris campaign’s open and couchless arms.

The post Is JD Vance Couch F**k Gag Fair Game – Or Is It Time For Kamala Harris Allies To Leave Sectional Healing Behind? first appeared on Mediaite.

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