Mayonnaise does not belong on an Oreo cookie.

We – all of us – instinctively know this. It’s why this post is marked as “Sports,” as opposed to “Opinion.” And if someone insisted otherwise, you would not believe that person. You would not believe that person because to do so would also mean believing that person needs a team of psychiatrists. “This person’s just trolling,” you’d say.

After all, trolls can be ignored. But eventually, all crazy must be reckoned with.

So what does one make of what occurred during ESPN’s Thursday telecast of something called the Duke’s Mayo Bowl? While we’d love to tell you how South Carolina downed UNC 38-21, there is a far more pressing and disturbing matter to discuss.

No, it was not the gross “mayo bath” that South Carolina coach Shane Beamer received upon coaching his team to victory – the result of a deranged bet with opposing coach Mack Brown.

Instead, the most notable moment of the telecast occurred in the broadcast booth. That is where Mike Golic Jr. committed a most egregious mayo-related crime against humanity. Not only did the former Notre Dame football standout dip an Oreo cookie in Duke’s Mayonnaise and eat it, he insisted to the viewing public – with a straight face – that it actually tasted good.

“Well, in the spirit of this bowl game,” said play-by-play man Anish Shroff, “and the in spirit of my partner Mike Golic Jr. – Mike, you came up with ideas of unconventional foods that work with mayonnaise.”

Golic held up what appeared to be an Oreo. “Cream-filled cookies here,” said Golic.

“You first,” said Shroff.

Then, in the most unsightly scene on a football broadcast since Lawrence Taylor shattered Joe Theismann’s leg, Golic dipped the Oreo in the mayonnaise and ate it.

“It’s a really interesting blend of flavors,” said Golic. “Thumbs up from me!”

Shroff, who followed suit, was subdued in his reaction.

“Oh, Anish,” said Golic. “We’re gonna need someone up here to call that drive. He’s not doing well. I’ve seen that face.”

“I’m working on it,” replied Shroff, who continued calling the action. “Ty Chandler to the outside, still have this Oreo cookie in my mouth. I will say, the aftertaste, actually not bad.”

“I’m telling you!” exclaimed Golic.

Ultimately, this mayo just be a case of Golic trying to be a team player by insisting the product of the bowl’s sponsor goes well with anything. It could also be grounds for commitment where the incident occurred.

Watch condiment crimes above via ESPN.

The post ESPN Analyst Eats Oreo Dipped in Mayo and Insists It Tastes Good in Condiment Crime of the Century first appeared on Mediaite.

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